How to comfort a friend

Just recently a very dear friend of mine had a lousy birthday...

really lousy...

she cried...

I felt bad... not that i was the one who made her cry, but mainly because i didn't know how to comfort her. I couldn't possibly imagine the pain she must have been going through, the emotional distress and the thought of having her hardwork suddenly going to waste.

Basically, she was the one who was a victim of circumstance...and I wasn't.

I felt guilty.

Guilty because any attempt i make at comforting her seems selfish. It seems selfish because im doing it to make myself feel better. When the person who really needs cheering up is her.

Sure i can say something supportive

I can praise her virtues through the roof

but the bottomline is... i don't know her pain... and if i can't feel it... all my efforts to comfort her may just be for the worse...

eventually with the help of some of my other friends, we managed to get her to stop crying and laughing again... it felt good to see her smile... im not sure if i did manage to help or if she feels much better now...

whatever it is, i hope that her next birthday will be even better than this year's

The right to wear, The Right to stare

When it comes to women and dress, i really have no favourites nor dislikes, in short i couldn't care less.

I doesn't really matter to me if a Woman covers up or doesn't, its her body and its her right to do what she wants with it...

I firmly believe that the likelihood of a woman getting raped/molested/sexually assaulted has nothing to do with her dress.. it mainly has something to do with the man's mind more than anything else.

However, women who dress to reveal must realise that wearing such dresses has its effects.

Effects? Such as?

Such as staring.

Yes. we men like to stare. Especially at whatever patch of flesh we spot on women. Be it bare shoulders, smooth thighs or even the small of their back/butt crack when they bend over or squat down.

Perverted? Depraved? Animalistic?

All fair and dandy if you think that way... Its not like we stare at hours on end, but we stare long enough... until someone notices that we are staring.

Somehow staring has become a social taboo of sorts... here we are surrounded by attractive women who dress revealing with and yet society demands that we don't stare...

Why not?

staring is harmless, its safe and it hurts no one (unless you don't see where you are going and walk into an open manhole).

I believe that if Women have a right to wear,

Men have a right to stare.

Don't think of staring as something carnal and debasing... think of it as a symbol of our appreciation for the woman's choice in dressing, thus we admire her beauty and aspects of her body whilst enjoying her feminine charms...

Of course there are times when staring must be done discreetly (or avoided entirely) such as:

- When the subject of your staring is with her boyfriend/husband
- When you are with your girlfriend/wife (in which case you might want to spend the better part of the day staring at her)

So the next time you catch some one staring, give the poor guy a break and let it be...

Work Ethics

What are work ethics?

For me an unemployed-yet-to-graduate... i believe my concept of work ethics are all messed up...

So m not really sure what will be required of me once i venture into the full-time working world...

Although maybe i have some taste of it, editing, writing articles for theCicak.. but its hardly any real challenge when compared to the REAL WORLD work...

REAL WORLD work? What is the real world anyway? Or maybe working world would be a better term..

oh well, having started a new job with a start-up.. dealing with a catalyst program for young entrepreneurs in Uni KL, i find that i have yet to get any crash course on work ethics...wondering if there are indeed any work ethics which i need to acquire?

Based on my very limited knowledge...

works ethics = hard work

haha!

do let me know if im wrong

Peaches Jo

In my previous post, somehow the link to my girlfriend's blog was lost.. :P

Here it is now:

http://peachesjo.blogspot.com/

or click here

you can also find it at the links on my blog

The benefits of covering up

In relation to my previous posting, i have come up with a short list of why wearing dresses which cover up are better than revealing ones.

Now, now.. before i'm mauled by a man-eating crowd of feminisits, i'm not saying that covered/uncovered women go to heaven/hell... heck, i don't know where im going anyway. Its just a practical look at the benefits of covering thyself:

Benefit 1: Protection against scratch and bruises

We all know how women want smooth, flawless skin... or at least that what all those ads make us think anyway. But if you went out...say.. sleeveless or in the shortest of skirts, you reveal more flesh, and thus the risk of accidentaly brushing against thorns or that odd piece of rusted metal increases. This can create very unsightly gashes on your once beautiful skin. Personally, i would say jeans are good, because they are tough and they cover.


Benefit 2: Protection against the cold

Yeah, Malaysia can get quite cold, mainly in those air-conditioned rooms... and when it rains...brr.... too many times have i seen female classmates shiver and shake because they decided to wear a halter top and shorts into class... forgetting to bring a jacket. Now if they were wearing long sleeves and perhaps pants of a durable material (think jeans!) they would be warmer perhaps?


Benefit 3: Protection against the sun

Malaysia is a sunny, sunny country. Often we see a lot of girls, with their umbrellas up... when its not even raining. According to the ads, women want fair, gentle skin... something which can be spoiled by a tanning caused by too much sun exposure. So by walking around in a revealing top/bottom, you increase the skin area which is exposed to the sun's rays, which means more that your skin will get darker. If you covered up on the other hand... the skin area is less exposed and you can maintain the fair quality of your skin. Or you could bring an umbrella..those clunky things...


All in all, it is riskier to wear revealing clothes... but im not saying women should all cover up... heck... i, like most other guys... prefer it if they don't... but im just saying that there are some obvious advantages to protecting yourself against the elements.

To Scant or not to scant...

Now im sure you all know the latest controversy brewing lately...oh well... its not a particularly new issue, its just that wheneve a PAS politicians opens his mouth on Women's dressing, fireworks are bound to ensue.

Yeah... if i had a RM 1 for everytime that issue popped up, i'd be rich by now.

Problem is, people still act like its a big deal... over something so tiny...(literally speaking ;) ).

So now PAS wants to instill a dress code in Kelantan.

Oh the outrage!

The Suffering!

The Humiliation!

But honestly... why bother?

Its not like they are forcing Women into slave labour or drafting all first born sons into military conscription. Although the concept of having a dress code enforced by the law may be foreign and barbaric to some of us, if it works for them... well.. who are we to tell other people how to run their state.

Selangor, although far more developed than Kelantan has been the target of a lot of high profile cases against our leaders. Not a very impressive track record i might say... so if anyone should reprimanding, its our Selangor leaders... their actions have far greater effect than those of a Serban-swathed Ulama' in Kelantan.

Anyway, this debate has brought around the whole 'what is the definition of scantily dressed?' Personally, i don't care what Girls wear... I, like most other hormonal young boys would prefer it if they wore nothing at all... but, of course, that isn't going to happen here...

In my theory, there are various stages of scantily dressed.. they are:

Scantily-Teasing:



This includes sleeveless tops, medium length skirts and tight jeans. This type of dress aims more to tease and draw short bursts of attention from fellow onlookers. Nothing too revealing, just enough to make guys give a few glances and say 'she's kinda cute!'....


Scantily-Revealing:



This includes spaghetti straps, near-transparent dresses, miniskirts, hotpants...etc..Scantily revelaing aims to send out a message: 'look at me... but no touching'. This sort of dress demands attention from onlookers. It captures their gaze and makes guys go like 'wow... she's hot...' (assuming of course, the wearer is hot... if otherwise, it would make guys puke in repulsion..).


Scantily-take it off already!!



huhuhuhu... this includes bikinis and any tiny two-piece get-up (think mini tube tops and hot pants). This dress aims to make people stare. Especially if worn in a public area. the effect is less pronounced on the beach... but in a mall... well... rest assured, the men will have a tough time walking. It makes guys go like... 'Ouch.. i wish i wore boxers today...'.


So, im not sure what these Kelantan dress guidelines are but if they are looking for consultants, i wouldn't mind helping out... if it means i get to analyse the levels of scantilyness amongst their womenfolk...hehehehe

For a just cause

My dream job is...

as i have often been repeating over these past few days, working together with the Nescafe Kickstart crew.

My dream job is to sell t-shirts for social awareness.

Its something i have been doing with some of my friends for a while but now we have the opportunity to really well... kickstart it!

The concept is simple:

We have a brand, Positive Outbreak,

we sell t-shirts with designs based on social issues

so they can be based on various social issues, such as animal rights, disabled people, children's rights etc...

The reason why we do this is because we want to generate more social awareness for these issues and we want to encourage the public, especially the younger generation to take part in volunteer activities.

So we sell our t-shirts, mainly targeted towards college students, although we also make designs for younger kids and the general public.

We sell them through retail outlets and through individual distributors.

In the long-term we hope to establish ourselves as a recognisable brand which is socially responsible.

We also hope to become an organisation which can help develop young people by teaching them valuable skills through volunteer activities.

We do all this in the name of Social Awareness.

to find out more, do check out

positiveoutbreak.blogspot.com

Whoah!

Whoah!

Back from exams! back from the dark end of self-imposed separation from online society.

Once again im back!

So.. what are my plans, hmhmhmhm, well, perhaps some controversial postings maybe hmhmhmhm...

oh well... or maybe a slightly less edgy posting about what i have been up to lately...

I am on nescafe kickstart!

yeah!

one of the 8 finalists!!! hope i don't get eliminated...

i wish i could talk more about it however i have sold my soul to the producers and i am bound by a 16-item contract to not spoil the show for the general public...(yes, that is you..)

Other than that.. hmm, well...

please do check out

positiveoutbreak.blogspot.com

and now i shall get back to my work on theCicak

(www.thecicak.com)!